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What Is Our Earthly Connection to Our Child?

After 13 years of grief and heartache, I have found peace - a peace and knowing that passes all understanding.   I know the peace and letting go of the "whys" have come to me by being a survivor in the hardest path anyone on earth can travel - pure faith in the unknown. I have spoken with countless people who have suffered a painful loss and these are the questions I hear from them more than any other.

Why do we experience loss and suffer while here on earth?
We all have a mission and a calling.  Our mission is to become fully realized in who we truly are through spiritual evolvement. Our calling is to utilize our talents, time and efforts to be of service to humanity in our own unique way. Pain ignites the soul and is the fuel that pushes us onward and upward. 

Why do children die prematurely?  
There is no greater joy than the birth of a child and no greater sorrow than the death of that child.  There is no greater connection to another soul on earth than that of a parent and child.  The parents have chosen before coming back to earth to catapult into spiritual wisdom and truth in their lifetime with the death of their child. 

Do children decide when and how they'll die before incarnating?
The child has agreed to help the parent evolve before coming to earth. Every person that impacts our lives is a spirit who agreed to help us along our path and that spiritual relationship ensures spiritual gains for both souls. There are no victims and no winners in a divine plan.  The earthly experiences we agree to help create with others facilitate what is needed next for the transformation of everyone involved.   

Some souls that come to earth have been here many times before and are very wise.  Their loving energy and passion is so powerful it takes only a short amount of time to fulfill their mission.  I place children at the top of that category. 

Where is my child now?
It is still very hard for me to imagine my child in any other form than the physical form that I hugged, loved and nurtured.  By many experiences, however, I know that their spirits are much greater than the physical form and they definitely stay with us and are there ready to help us.  I talked to Joann even at times I didn’t believe she was there and one day she answered me. 

How do I resume life with this aching in my heart?
Each person experiencing a tragedy has his own unique process.  Here are five suggestions for utilizing loss as a portal for personal transformation and spiritual enlightenment: 

  • Be real and accept your feelings; don’t fight or be afraid of them. 
    They are a valuable part of your learning to live in the moment again with love for yourself and a purpose in life.  They will not last forever if you let them flow.  If you don't let them flow through you, they will return like a tidal wave when you least expect it.  You may not understand them but they are telling you something about who you are and what you value - listen to them. 

  • You will know and you will know when it is time to ask for help.
    When you need support or assurance, find someone who will let you be who you are each day, even if you change from hour to hour in your moods and willingness to participate in life. From the moment you heard your child died, your heart began crying for help.  Your request for help can be loud cries of agony, pleas for help, peaceful prayers, tears of surrender, a conversation with the lost loved one, or sessions with counselors.  When asked, spirit conspires to put you in certain places to meet certain people who will encourage you and give you what you need. 

  • Take steps to learn to trust yourself. 
    Strengthen your  discernment skills of what is real for you during an experience - what you can use to help you along your way and what you need to discard that others are saying to you.  You are your best expert of who you are, where you are and what you need.

  • Do something to release the depression and stress built up in your body.
    It is amazing how physical activity can serve as a pain killer.  Sometimes riding my bike puts me in a zone of acceptance and faith that the best of my days of my life are not over.  Sometimes I scream loudly as I hit a pillow on my couch with a plastic bat.  

Copyright 2012 Janie Wells Payment for Passage promotes living in the moment as your authentic self.  This website is for assisting with personal transformation and proof that angels DO exist.  It is not meant to replace therapeutic, medical or counseling disciplines.